Friday, December 9, 2011

Preview: Mad Magazine's Dumbest People of 2011

Every year Mad Magazine takes a strog jab at some of the dumbest things of the past year.  This year is no exception.  Expected to hit the news stands next week, Mad Magazine's Dumbest People of 2011 takes a no-hold-barred swing at politics, pop culture, scandal, and anything else that isn't tied down.  Nothing is safe.

Mad offers a preview to many sites on the Internet.  The pictures below came from the Huffington Post.  Once the latest edition hits the stands, I'll be sure to bring the humor to you.  Until then, enjoy a preview of the Top Five Dumbest People (and events) of 2011.

"If you ask me, their political commentary is often as spot-on and relevant as The Daily Show and SNL..."

Take a look at the top five after the jump.  I included Mad magazine's narritive.  (Click on picture to enlarge.) 
5.  The wedding of Kim Kardasian and Kris Humphries:

When the reigning Princess of Reality TV Kim Kardashian announced she was getting married, many couldn't wait for the big day to arrive.  But for anyone who was paying attention, it quickly became clear that this was less a wedding and more a for-profit, merchandising expo.  E! paid over $15 million for the rights to televise the ceremony.  People magazine coughed up another $1.5 million for the photos.  Plus hundreds of thousands more in free merchandise.  The wedding was everything you'd expect from the Kardashians -- over-hyped, B-list star-studded and tacky.  Kim wore white (tee hee), but then, a mere 72 days into their fairy tale life, they announced it was over.  The couple is said to be devastated, but not so devastated as to think of returning the gifts and the money.  When it comes to unmitigated greed and gall, it's impossible to keep up with the Kardashians. 

4.  Anthony Weiner-gate:

One of Congress's most vocal Progressives and a likely candidate for Mayor of New York City in 2013, Anthony Weiner's star was on the rise.  Unfortunately, his star wasn't the only thing on the rise.  After accidentally posting a photo of his engorged tighty-whities meant for a 21-year-old college student to his public Twitter feed (And you thought autocorrect was bad!), right-wing bottom feeder Andrew Breitbart got a hold of it (figuratively), and spread the word.  The recently-married Weiner resigned under pressure, even though he never met, touched or had sexual contact with any of the women in question - his kink was social intercourse, via networking sites including Twitter, Facebook, yfrog, and his cell phone.  What to do now?  Considering Weiner is such a convincing speaker, he could find work as a commercial spokesman.

3.  Penn State Sex Scandal:

There's nothing more repugnant than the molesting of 10-year-old boys.  But what comes close is doing nothing to stop the molesting of 10-year-old boys when you have the chance.  (If you don't believes us, ask the Pope.)  Just as a fish rots from the head, a college football program rots from the head coach.  Penn State's Joe Paterno, his assistants and even the college president could have stopped alleged pedophile Jerry Sandusky at the line of scrimmage.  Instead, by looking the other way, they allowed him to repeatedly abuse minors.  It is said that evil triumphs when good men do nothing.  Touchdown evil.  

2.  Air Traffic Controllers falling asleep on the job:

Between the uncomfortable, cramped seats, crying babies and stupid announcements, we always have trouble sleeping on an airplane.  Not so for some of those who work IN the airline industry.  Specifically, we're referencing some air traffic controllers who had no problem catching 40 winks even as planes blipped by on their radar screens, feverishly radioing for flight instructions.  The controllers claim that sitting in a dark room and staring at a screen for hours can quickly lull one into a deep sleep.  Bull!  If that were true, then how is it that millions of married men spend half the night transfixed by their computer screens looking at porn and never doze off for so much as a second?!?  Maybe the FAA needs to treat air traffic controllers like little children and put even the most basic and obvious rules in a simple manual.  Let's just hope they don't nod off while reading it. 

1.  U.S. Debt Ceiling Standoff:

Raising the debt ceiling - a fairly mundane budget procedure done seven times by the Republican Congress during the Bush administration.  But this time was different: Barack Obama, a Democrat, wanted to raise it.  Suddenly the Republicans became the party of fiscal conservatives; demanding huge cuts in Medicare and Social Security before they would raise anything (except their rhetoric).  In true fashion, Obama, who never met an issue he didn't want to let somebody else take the lead on, whined and then quickly caved, giving the Republicans 94% of what they sought.  But that wasn't enough for the Tea party-cowed Republicans.  The result was a lowering of the U.S. credit rating, a huge drop in the markets and the near-explosion of Paul Krugman's head.  Not for an instant was there anything resembling leadership on this issue, as virtually all of our gutless elected officials stumbled around D.C. like the pack of grotesque zombies that they are.

What do you think of Mad's top five dumbest people (events) of 2011?

Do you want to see 6 - 20?
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