Monday, September 16, 2013

Attack Of The She-Creeper

"Marrrrrcus - I don't have any panties on."
-Eartha Kitt/Lady Eloise, "Boomerang"

2013 will go down as the Year of the Creeper, given all the attention the topic has received in so many venues online: Popehat, Dr. Nerdlove, John Scalzi, Hugo Schwyzer, and of course the familiar Internet Feminist outlets like Jezebel and Feministing and Feministe, etc, et al, have discussed this topic at marathon-length, with heaping helpings of even more discussion on topics such as Street Harassment and the like along the way, and all of it again, is rightly deserved.

Of course, your intrepid correspondent is always on the lookout for, as Steve Sailer likes to call it, the dog that doesn't bark - and in that case, that would be what I refer to, as the She-Creeper.

Oh yes, there IS such an animal, as the She-Creeper - and unlike the Yeti or Lochness Monster, we've all seen her in action, too. But just for kicks, let's go there - who, is the She-Creeper?



Well, as the name infers, the She-Creeper is someone who violates the personal space and boundaries of others (She-Creepers can and often do this to other Women as well, but for purposes of this discussion we are only going to focus on the She-Creeper-to-Hapless Male dynamic, and for reasons that are well-justified; read on), often in sexual ways, that just, you know, creeps you out. They give guys unsolicited/unwanted "compliments", jump into conversations uninvited, touch guys unwanted, and almost never miss an opportunity to make sexually implicit remarks or jokes (sound familiar?) to guys they've got their creepy eyes on.

Now, and this is based on my own extensive observation and experience over the years, I've found one defining characteristic of the She-Creeper: she tends to be an older Woman, and by "older" we are talking north of 35 years of age. You see, while there is much discussion in our time over who-should-do-what in terms of dating and mating (like who should pay for the first date, who should approach who, etc, et al), what's often left out is the crucial factor of Time, and the role it plays in the mating dynamic among humans. Or, in other words, Women tend to get just a weebit more forward with age - often, creepily so. 

Toss in half a dozen bottles of wine and spirits into the mix, and it will not be at all unusual to see the more seasoned gals out there on the make in ways that would make even the most clueless Fanboy look innocuous. I've both seen and been the unfortunate recipient of the "attentions" of such Eartha Kitt knockoffs, and it is NOT appealing in the least. No, all She-Creepers aren't over the age of 35; and no, all She-Creepers aren't lushes; but there does seem to be a correlation here of these factors.

In any event, the She-Creeper is Real, and everyone reading this knows it, too.

"OK Obsidian", some of you may ask - "if indeed this is such a pressing problem for our society, why aren't Men doing anything about it? After all, most guys don't seem to have too much of a problem with this supposed "She-Creeper" - a lot of them actually look like they enjoy it!".

All good questions. Let's answer them each in turn, shall we?

1. One major reason as to why Men aren't particularly vocal about being harassed by She-Creepers is due to this Orwellian system of Social Justice Triage that has been foisted upon them - anything that is perceived to impact Women, like the male variety of Creepers, street harassment and the like, must be addressed first and foremost, on the grounds that Men are stronger than Women and can pose a threat to them. If we were still living on the African Savannah back in the Land Before Time, or if we were still out on the frontier before the West Was Won, I might have gone along with that argument. However, we now live in the 21st century, where even children can operate Soviet-made AK-47 assault rifles, and it is not at all unusual to find copious amounts of video footage of Women administering severe amounts of Kickass onto hapless male victims. And of course, there's the infamous film "Fatal Attraction". Men in general, and Black Men in particular, have been cowed into silence against their own interests and well-being, which explains in part why there has been such a muted response amongst the fellas; but there's another related reason, too:

2. Because of the idea that All Men Want Sex All The Time From Anything That Moves. While there is compelling evidence culled from the researches of Evolutionary Psychology and other disciplines that Men do indeed think more of sex and the like than do Women, seek out mating opportunities more than Women, and would appreciate approaches from Women more than the other way around, what's left out of the ensuing discussions about all this is (1), Age, as I've noted above (Men tend to be more interested in and receptive to, mating opportunities with younger Women than older, all things being equal), (2), that such studies are looking at the aggregate male response, not the indivudual one. Just because guys in general may like a "Cougar" approaching him, it is erroneous to think ALL guys would like it, and in fact quite a few DO NOT. While EvoPsych researchers are well aware of these and other facts (like physical attractiveness, which often is correlated with relative youth, etc.), the fact remains that layman discussions on these topics always tends to leave these details out. Many Men do not like being approached by old(er), often lesser attractive Women who aggressively speaks of sexual topics and often are intoxicated to boot, and our culture/society treats such events as either the guys in question "getting lucky" or failing that, as something to bust a gut over. Many guys don't say anything because of the embarrassment and/or shame - something that should and must, stop. 

There is one final answer I would like to give to the rhetorical question above; it is this:

3. To say that it is the problem of Men and Men alone, to address She-Creepers, would be like me or any other Man to say that the problem of street harassment is something Women to address alone - and we all know that isn't true. So long as Women in general are content to sit on the sidelines and turn a blind eye to the very real issue of She-Creepers, IT WILL NOT STOP. If it is important for Men to step into situations where clearly the Woman doesn't want to be bothered, there is no good reason to exempt Women from doing the same when a She-Creeper is on the make. In short, the Epidemic of She-Creepers is the Acid Test of the Strong, Independent Woman of the 21st Century - will she heed the call and step into the gap - or will she wimp-out with a copout, and retreat to the fainting couch like the proverbial Damsel in Distress? 

In closing: I find it fascinating that in an age where all things are deemed to be and must be equal between the sexes, certain issues are oddly reserved only for Men - thus the reason why I write today. Being a Creeper, contrary to the propoganda of opportunists with clear and present agendas to promote and axes to grind, is NOT just a "male-only" enterprise - there are quite a few of the female variety out there, too. 

And it is time that we began to call them out for their creepy behaviors, in this Year of the Creeper 2013.

Consider this essay, the first shot across the bow, in that regard.

Now adjourn your arses...

The Obsidian
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