Monday, December 8, 2008

Conspiracy Theory #314,159,265: Obama Is Not a U.S. Citizen


A few notes ago I wrote a piece on what happens when you drop seeds of fear and hate into people in a post-9/11 American society. Well, behold as one of those seeds has come into fruition in the form of a lawsuit seeking to stop Obama from becoming the 44th President of the United States on the basis of his citizenship. Yes it is true, somebody actually went there.

Article II of the Constitution defines the Presidency. In the first section of Article II it states:

"No person except a natural born citizen, or a citizen of the United States, at the time of the adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the office of President; neither shall any person be eligible to that office who shall not have attained to the age of thirty five years, and been fourteen Years a resident within the United States."

So in order to be President you gotta be (a) born here; (b) be 35 or older; and (c) have lived here for 14 years.

As we all know, on November 4th of this year Barack Obama became the new President-Elect of the United States by a decisive 365 to 173 electoral vote victory, earning the largest popular vote in U.S history with 66.8 million votes to McCain's 58.3 million. As we also know, the President-Elect does not officially become the President until the BCS-like electoral college physically reports each state's electoral votes to Congress allowing the President-Elect to then be officially sworn in on January 20th.

That being said, Obama opponents see the gap between the election and the inauguration as an opportunity to achieve in the court room what they were unable to achieve on election day. In a very Terminator 2 type fashion, if they can somehow invalidate Obama in the courts before he officially becomes the President then it will be as if Obama never existed, and if he doesn't exist then he can't lead the rebellion against the machines in the future. Sweet!



In order to achieve this goal, Skynet has sent two types of lawsuits through the time portal: (i) lawsuits that allege Obama was not born in America; and (ii) lawsuits that allege that even though Obama was born in America, he is not a citizen because he lived abroad.

A lawyer from the Dirty Jersey by the name of Leo Donofrio filed a law suit of the second flavor against the NJ Secretary of State entitled Donofrio v. Wells. It made its way to the United States Supreme Court which, as of this morning, officially denied Certiorari to the case (refused to hear the case).

But they don't stop there. There are a number of other suits filed against Obama as we speak that are working their ways up the appellate ladder. There are two other cases at the Supreme Court right now, however neither of them have been scheduled for consideration yet. The case most talked about on the conspiracy theorist blogs was filed by Philip J. Berg of Lafayette Hill, Pennsylvania. Even though Hawaii state officials have confirmed Obama's birth certificate and citizenship, Berg's lawsuit argues that Obama was born in Kenya, not Hawaii. In the alternative, Berg's lawsuit argues that Obama may have renounced his citizenship as a boy in Indonesia, where he lived for a time with his mother and stepfather.

You couldn't make this stuff up.

Let us hope that the Supreme Court's action today sends a clear message to these and other conspiracy theorists that it refuses to even entertain these types of arguments. Let us further hope that it can maintain this position until January 20th, lest we undo the votes of 66.8 million people in the nation that proclaims that every vote counts. Nevertheless, if this is any indication of the resolve of those who just can't stomach an Obama Presidency then you can bet your sub-prime mortgage that it's only a matter of days before these same folks will try to impeach him once he takes office. You heard it here first folks.

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